


As Fast as you Can

by BlueMoonHound



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Death, Mentions of Violence, Multi, Mutant Eridan, mutant everyone lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2018-11-11 08:13:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11144427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueMoonHound/pseuds/BlueMoonHound
Summary: Cosmetic mutations. In a highblood, it's hardly a concern to the empire. Especially one so close to the color of the Condesce herself. In the past, however, that hasn't stopped her from culling them. They do carry on genetically into descendants, and mess with Her plans. To have that in the slurry? It could end up in lowbloods, who would be culled on sight, midbloods, who would be shunned, or – gog forbid – the Tyrian line itself. You're only important because you're an orphaner and no one else can hold that job.





	1. Karkat

**Author's Note:**

> Graphic depictions of eridan and or karkat having conniptions...  
> Might be a second chapter to this, i dont know. We'll see if i finish this. In the meantime, have, enjoy :p  
> Most of the shippy stuff will b in the next chapter (if i finish it.) Actually, it's kinda long, like 6000 words or something, so maybe I'll split that up too.

– caligulasAquarium [ca] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [cg] !! –

CA: kar  
CA: this is probably reely fuckin shockin, so im sorry in advvance  
CA: but  
CA: her imperious condescension wwants me to cull you  
CG: WHAT  
CG: IF THAT WAS TRUE YOU WOULDN'T BE TELLING ME  
CG: YOU HATE US  
CG: YOU HATE LANDDWELLERS  
CG: SO  
CG: WHAT OBVIOUSLY DRASTIC AND REDICULOUS THING CONVINCED YOU THAT THIS WAS A GOOD JOKE TO MAKE  
CA: I dont knoww  
CA: im breakin a billion lawws by tellin ya  
CA: but  
CA: I guess I just wwant you to knoww  
CA: cause if I come into your house wwith my gun and a murderous expression maybe you'll be able to kill me before I get the chance

– caligulasAquarium [ca] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [cg] !! –

CG: WHAT  
CG: … IM GOING TO ASSUME THAT THAT WAS A JOKE, AND TRY TO FORGET IT HAPPENED

 

* * *

 

 

You'd spent half your childhood trying to hide it. Vriska believed you, though Fef had known you long enough to know that none of your boasts and brags were true. Yes, hair dye is available to highbloods. No, you've never used it-- and no, your eyes weren't coming in early, you've had spots in them since you hatched.

When you figured out who Kar's ancestor was, his entire angry, gray gimmick had made sense to you. And you hadn't told a soul, because while you know you can't possibly understand now, you thought you knew at the time. Because you're privledged, and stupid, and your life has never been worth a damn to anyone. If you continue your genetic line, your descendants will just get your mutations – and you know for a fact that your ancestor didn't have those, so it's all you. It's all you and it always has been, and your mutations are so much more your own fault than Karkat's will ever be.

You were tempted to dye your hair black once upon a time. Now that your eyes are all filled in, no one can tell that those are odd, but you're never going to forget what it felt like to realize that they should have been completely gray.

_Cosmetic mutations. In a highblood, it's hardly a concern to the empire. Especially one so close to the color of the Condesce herself. In the past, however, that hasn't stopped her from culling them. They do carry on genetically into descendants, and mess with Her plans. To have that in the slurry? It could end up in lowbloods, who would be culled on sight, midbloods, who would be shunned, or – gog forbid – the Tyrian line itself. You're only important because you're an orphaner and no one else can hold that job._

And then the day you knew was coming had arrived, when something – though you don't know what – had made its way past Kar's amazing defense, despite the gray contacts you sent him in the mail when you turned eight, and now the Lady knew he was mutated. You had expected her to send culling drones to his place, or to cull him herself, or maybe even send a blueblood executioner, but instead she called you to her ship and told you that it was your job now, and if you didn't prove yourself capable here you'd be culled like the worthless mutant you are and everyone would die.

Now you have a choice to make, and really all you want to do is run your head into a wall till you crack your horns or maybe cry yourself to sleep.

You giggle and stare at your quivering fingers, full of suddenly gross finery that you don't really feel like you deserve to be wearing, and you realize that yeah, maybe sleep would be a good idea. It's not like she expects you to do it today. It might be too much to ask of him but maybe Kar can take your place as an orphaner after he kills you. Maybe she'll excuse him like she did you, despite his mutation being much more cullworthy, because he's keeping the race alive.

You hiccup, tearing your rings off your fingers one by one and hurling them against the wall.

 

* * *

 

It's raining.

You watch little droplets of water roll down the window, and you remember your conversation with Eridan the other day. It was a joke, right? Why would the Condesce ask him to kill you? Wouldn't she send an executioner who was actually trained in the job? Not that fishface isn't trained in killing. He's been killing lusii since he was five. It doesn't make sense, so it must be a joke.

You can't get the little ball of fear out of the pit of your stomach.

Unless… unless Eridan did something stupid recently, and he needs to prove that he's worth keeping around.

And knowing him, that would actually happen.

Fuck.

You're not making your worry lessen.

Next question: why on Alternia would he TELL you about it? He wouldn't, would he? He'd just arrive with ahab's in his hand and blow a hole through your chest and bring your bloody head back to his master. Yeah, he's known about your mutation since he first researched the sufferer when you were kids, and he DID send you contacts which fit you suprisingly well and were just the right shade of gray – where did he _get_ those? Why did he _have_ them? _He's_ never needed to hide his color-- but he's still a casteist imbicile and you have no idea whether he did that for your sake or for some ulterior motive. You chew the sleeve of your shirt as a raindrop runs down past your field of vision, sluggish, and disappears into the puddles along the sill.

Someone knocks on your door. You shoot to your feet, grabbing a sickle off the table, and head towards the livingblock, heart beating in your throat like a frightened hopbeast. You open the door and – yeah, that's Eridan, looking tired and bedraggled, wet hair falling into his eyes. His glasses are nowhere to be seen. You guess that he took them off because it's raining. He's wearing a long brown cloak with the hood off – the kind designed to completely hide your body and face, except that doesn't work at all when the hood isn't pulled up – and the plainest aquarius shirt and gray pants you've ever seen him wear.

“What.” you say. He runs a shaky hand through his hair.

“I thought it w-was best if w-we… didn't talk about this on trollian w-where the w-whole w-world can read it… so I… I shoulda told you I w-was comin but… id'a hav-ve ta tell sol to delete the traces a that too… and he's already angry at me--”

“Oh fuck you, just come inside, you're shivering. Have you been standing outside the door with your hood down for the past twenty minutes? You're soaked.” You tighten your grip on the sickle and swing the door open. He winces a little when he sees the weapon but doesn't comment.

You lock the door, and throw a towel on the couch. “Take off your stupid cloak, you're soaking wet. I'll stick it in the dryer.”

He unfastens it and hands it to you, standing kind of near the couch like he wants to sit down but he's not sure if he's allowed to. It's a look that just doesn't fit him. You've seen that on Tavros and Equius and even sometimes Terezi but Eridan? What the fuck. What the fuck is going on.

You shove the cloak into the dryer, your sixth sense keeping you so alert that when Eridan coughs back in the livingblock you nearly cut your door in half with the sickle you had forgotten you were still holding.

You head back, a little surprised to see that he's still standing there, staring at his feet, wiggly dark curls dripping water on the carpet. His violet stripe isn't swept back from his face the way it usually is-- in fact, a secret, more natural part has revealed itself in his hair, splitting it in two. It looks weird that way. You wonder how often he has to redye the damn thing. Once a week? Or maybe he just fixes it before he sees people – you've never seen his roots.

No. he must do it more regularly. He doesn't look like he put ANY effort into his appearance today. Fuck, he's not even wearing his _rings_. There's no way he went out of his way to dye his hair before he came.

“Sit the fuck down, fishface, and tell me why you're here.”

He glances at you, then sits down in the chair like he's afraid he'll have to get up and run at any moment and chews on a finger.

You sit down across from him in an armchair and lean forward on your knees, sickle still clearly ready in your hand.

“Well?”

He takes his finger out of his mouth and stares at his knees.

“Ya gotta cull me, kar.”

Your brain stutters to a halt for a moment. “What the fuck, Eridan. What the FUCK?”

“No-no gog I shoulda explained first – please just let me--” he stares at you with his hands out like he's expecting you to go at him with your sickle, which you realize you've raised defensively, and you slide a little farther back in your chair.

“Fine. Fucking explain.”

“W-well I – so-- ya know-w, I'm a mutant, and condy knows i'm a mutant, and she somehow-w f-figured out that you're a, mutant, and she said w-whale this is your chance, an, you've done good for the empire, so if you can cull your mutant friend dow-wn there on planetside ill let ya liv-ve but like… I – I don't w-wanna kill ya, kar, I just don't, an' maybe if she'll spare me cause I'm an orphaner if I cull ya maybe she'll spare ya if you cull me and take my job. So. uh.” He sticks his finger back in his mouth, peeling back the skin on his fingers with sharp teeth till he manages to make droplets of violet blood bubble to the surface. You watch a little droplet of blood run down his hand with the same fascination you had watched rain roll down the window while you try to get the information he's just dumped upon you through your brain. It takes a few minutes before you can say anything at all.

“You're a mutant?”

He stops licking the trail of blood off his hand and stares at you, confused. You look him up and down. What about him is mutated? Can he not breathe water or something? You know he hardly swims, but last time you checked he was capable. You don't think seadwellers who can't breathe water can make it out of the trials at all.

“What about you is mutated?”

He stares at his hand like it's the most fascinating thing in the universe for what feels like an hour.

“You didn't … you didn't figure it out? I know-w we don't hang out a lot but… kar… we've known each other since we were four.” He runs a hand through his hair, getting little droplets everywhere as he does so. “I always lied. It's natural. I've never touched hair dye in my life… there's other things, too, obviously. Just the hair wouldnt'a brought her attention. But. That stuff's pretty secret. And… I'm obv-viously… not…. right.”

You remember that he had little speckles in his eyes as a kid and the gray contacts he had sent you-- which you're wearing, right now, like the ungrateful little fucknook you are, and you reach towards your eye only to rest your hands on your cheekbone and lean forward on your elbows, watching him. He wraps his arms around himself and quivers, looking nothing short of resigned and tired.

“You want me to kill you and become a fucking orphaner. So I can survive, maybe. No. Fuck you, I'm not doing that. Sorry. Besides, my mutation is WAY more of a big deal than yours is. Early spots in your eyes and a fucking stripe in your hair? You do understand what off-spectrum means, right? I'm fucking off-spectrum. I've been cullbait since I HATCHED and it's a miracle I'm still fucking here. So no. That's just going to get us both killed.”

He sits up, earfins flaring like they don't quite want to. “Well I'm sure as FUCK not killin you neither so I guess we can both fuckin' die anyway!”

“What the fuck, Eridan? You've killed thousands. Why does one mutant bother you so much?”  
You watch as his demeanor sags, and his earfins droop towards the floor again. But this time, instead of paying attention to you, he just puts his face in his hands. You chew on the inside of your mouth. Is he crying?

You wait about ten minutes before getting up and crossing the room. You touch his arm with your hand and jerk it back instantly.

“Fuck, you're freezing. Did you walk here? Did you walk here all the way from your fucking shiphive, in the rain? I live miles from shore! What the fuck Eridan!”

“Wasn't rainin' when I left,” he says. “Didn't matter. I came here to die.”

“Hey. Fuck. Fuck no. Come on. Get up.” You yank at his arm and he jolts up. Fuck yes, being taller than him certainly pays off at times. (he's also always been skinnier than you, despite your state as a beanpole-- he looks like he's just never eaten a thing in his whole life, and it's kinda scary.) “You're going to take a bath, and put on dry clothing. Then we can talk. Okay?”

Eridan nods just a little, leaning against you, and you almost flinch away because FUCK he's cold. You know seadwellers run really low but Feferi's never felt this cold, and she's a full two degrees cooler blooded than he is. You tug him to your ablutionsblock and fill it up with sort of warm water. Eridan sits on the load gaper and watches you with hooded eyes. You realize he still hasn't put on his glasses.

“Where are your fucking glasses, anyway?”  
Eridan reaches up to touch his face like he didn't realize they weren't there and then he shrugs.

“I… uh. Musta forgot em.”

“How do you forget something you need to fucking see???”

“s not like I planned on lookin at anything extra special today, Kar. Does explain why I've got a headache, though.”

You put your face in your hands. “Uuughghh.”

“Sorry.”

“The fuck are you apologizing for, asshole? Do you have spares in your captchalouge?”

He pulls out a pair of white glasses with aquarius symbols on the lenses and you laugh out loud without intending to do so. He winces and recaptchalouges them.

“The tub ought to be full enough now,” you say, getting up. “I assume you can get yourself undressed. You better not feel like an ice cube when you come out. I'm going to get you some dry clothes.”

He mumbles something.

“What's that, bulgeass?”  
“Your stuffs all gonna be too big.”  
“Better too big then too small, right? You're only like three inches shorter than me. Shut up and get in the tub.”

you close the door behind you a little louder than necessary.

 

 

* * *

 

The short list of things you're good at has expanded to include lying in Karkat Vantas's bathtub, staring at the ceiling and wondering why you're still alive.

There's a little ball of panic in your gut right now, too stubborn to leave. You swallow against it and turn on your side. The water isn't really too warm for you, you know it isn't, but you've been so cold for the past few hours that it feels scalding against your skin. You would love to clean yourself off a little more thoroughly, but you don't dare touch any of the soap and shampoo on the shelves. It's probably the only bottles he'll have all perigree. You're glad, at least, that you won't be wasting Kar's hot water. Lowbloods don't get big enough allowances to start with.

Not that Kar's exactly a lowblood.

He's about midblood height, and he's got teeth that are too sharp and even to be low or midblood teeth but too dull to be seadweller dentition – you have no idea where he would fit on the spectrum were he to fit on it. Somewhere between fuchsia and rust, maybe. You wonder if he has gills.

You finally sit up, tired of lying in freshwater, and dry yourself off with a plain black towel sitting on the countertop. You adjust it over the towel rack for a few minutes.

You're nervous as fuck.

You pull on Karkat's shirt and it hangs off you like it might hang off a skeleton. You give your ribs an experimental poke. You keep telling yourself you need to eat, but if you remember to you feel sick, and you forget to far too often.

His pants are far too big too but thankfully he provided a belt. You roll up the legs.

You wish he'd left socks but… that would have been weird. You leave your clothes on the bathroom floor since they're soaking wet and cold and you don't want to deal with that right now.

You pad out into the hallway. It's empty. You stand there for a moment, words stuck in your throat and thoughts clogging your brain. You feel extremely alone. _Go cull your best friend, it's the only way to survive. Prove yourself, you useless little fishtroll. You can't even swim deep enough to hunt sea lusii without popping your lungs open_. You rub your arms through Karkat's shirt and lean against the wall.

Maybe he ran for it. Maybe he took his chance and left, because he doesn't trust you. You wouldn't put it past him and you definitely wouldn't blame him for it. You can sit here and rot away till Condy sends drones to make sure you went through with her awful deed and then they can kill you where you lie. You hiccup and stare at your toes. You need to trim your claws. This is so stupid.

_Why were you even willing to do this, you fuck? Who sacrifices their own life for people who probably wouldn't make it out anyway? What kinda suicidal dickmunch ARE you?_

You counter your own thoughts. _I've killed how many wigglers? Maybe it's time they got their turn at me._

_Karkat is going to die anyway._

_Fuck if I'm not going to save the descendant of the signless!_

_You're insane._

_Look who's talking!!_

_Shut up! You know I'm the right one! You know I know this shit better than you do. Yeah we're in the same brain! Yeah we're the same person! That doesn't make YOU right. So. Shut up._

_Fuck you._

A third, quieter part of your brain points out the absurdity behind the entire argument, and that shuts you up, for a little bit, anyway.

You slide down the wall.

You can hear your heartbeat in your fins, a little pulsating signal that makes you want to wiggle them, just to make sure they're still there and they're not going to evaporate off your head. You pick at a hangnail, tug at your fins, absently lean your head against one hand. You want your scarf. Why did you leave your scarf at home? It makes no sense. Probably some pretensious thought about keeping it blood free, but it would have been nice to have it through the whole conversation about whether or not you were going to die. It'd be nice to have it now, for that matter. Your head feels weird and heavy and achey like you're going to cry.

Everything feels so wrong right now. You're not even wearing your own clothes. You don't have your rings or your scarf or you cape, you're leaning against someone else's wall in a house you don't frequently visit and your only pair of glasses is the kind which makes your head hurt. You hiccup again, and this time tears well up past your lashes and you can't stop yourself from convulsing with quiet sobs.

Minutes stretch past like hours, and you shudder.

“Eridan?”

You sit up, wiping your eyes. Karkat's irises gleam bright red in the darkness. You stare at him.

“Eridan what the fuck, are you okay?”

You want to say something but your words get stuck in your throat again, and you just make a huffing noise. You look away.

“Come on, were we going to talk?” His voice is suddenly softer, the way you've heard him talk when Sol's not doing great. You push yourself to your feet, still leaning against the wall.

“I was in the recreationblock on the third floor… it's more secluded than the livingblock and more comfortable than my respiteblock...”

You nod and follow him. By the time you reach the third floor you're starting to feel dizzy and tired. It's not even been that long of a day, but you guess that the stress of the past few nights has started to eat at you. He plops down on a big lopsided couch and pats the cushion next to him, gesturing for you to sit. You curl up with your feet on the chair.

He stares at your unclipped toenails like he's upset with their existence and you're about to put your feet on the floor when he looks up at your face.

“We need to figure out how we're going to run away and hide. Does anyone else know about this?”

“Sol,” you say. You pull your knees up closer to your chest.

“What does he know?”

“He know-ws that I sent you a message sayin' that I have to cull you. He know-ws that I asked him to delete all traces of that from the internet. He knows I asked him to delete the conversation about deleting the message, too. I'm sorry I.. shoulda thought before I sent that to ya in the first place, but I was.. kinda freakin out...”

“You're still freaking out. Sollux is also a mutant, remember? In fact he's really fucking powerful. Maybe he can help us.”

“Oh,” you mumble.

You feel weird.

Karkat looks at your face like he's trying to read your expression. “You need to sleep. I'll take care of this. Think you can manage the stairs?”

“You want me to sleep in your coon?”

“Why the fuck not? You've decided you pity me enough to have a fucking conniption over my death, I might as well offer you some basic fucking courtesy. Go on. Scoot. I don't care if you get those clothes slimy, it's fine.”

You stand up and sway a little, your head suddenly pounding. Oh, fuck. You steady yourself on the railing of the stairway and make your way slowly to the respiteblock. You blink when you reach it. The sopor is going to be far too hot, but you don't want to ask Kar to change the settings and you don't want to touch his stuff without permission, so you just climb in and try your hardest to deal.


	2. Eridan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \--carcinoGeneticist [cg] began trolling twinArmageddons [ta]!!--
> 
> CG: COME TO MY HIVE AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE.  
>  CG: DELETE THIS THREAD UPON RECIEPT.  
>  CG: JUST DO IT. SEE YOU SOON.
> 
> \--carcinoGeneticist [cg] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [ta]!!--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was worried there was too much intermediary stuff in this part, but I think it's fine and relevant (and somewhat necessary.) Enjoy!

\--carcinoGeneticist [cg] began trolling twinArmageddons [ta]!!--

CG: COME TO MY HIVE AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE.  
CG: DELETE THIS THREAD UPON RECIEPT.  
CG: JUST DO IT. SEE YOU SOON.

\--carcinoGeneticist [cg] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [ta]!!--  


* * *

 

Your name is Sollux Captor and you have a headache.

This is, of course, pretty much a universal constant for you, but you SWEAR it got worse when you read the message on your screen – What's going on? Is KK hurt? Does this have to do with ED's message to him earlier? _The one he asked you to delete_ , your brain reminds you. You wouldn't have even seen it if that weren't the case. You grumble to yourself. Stupid, stupid, STUPID!

Time to go dig your kismesis out of whatever hole he dug himself into.

You delete the message, and start packing a bag. Let's see, if ED-- Eridan, fuck if he deserves nicknames when he might have killed your quad-- was actually sent to cull him, KK is probably on the run or going to be soon. You don't need a weapon, really, you're stronger than both of them with your psionics – but you pack some throwing stars anyway. Eridan is known for using long range weapons. You make about fifteen sandwiches in various flavors and grab several six-packs of energy drinks on the way out. Yeah, he said his hive, but if nothing else you don't want to be alone in some brooding cavern with no food that you actually enjoy eating. Might as well be comfortable for a few days.

You grab your palmhusk too. If there's a connection anywhere, you might be able to erase your existence from the system while you're in hiding. That won't save you from the Condesce, but it'll buy you time.

_Wow. If any of that is even true. Maybe everything is fine, stop being such a huge pissbaby. Not everything is the worst case scenario._

_They could both be dead at this very moment._

_Fuck._

You fly out your window.

 

It stops raining about halfway to KK's house.

You walk part of the way. It's fucking tiring, all that flying, but in between settlements it's somewhat safe to touch down, so you do. You sip on a bottle you'd filled with a sugary drink and watch the moons switch places in the sky. One of them is new tonight, the other nearly full, but you can still see the colors their bioluminescence puts off. You blink and turn your eyes back towards the road.

Only a few more suburbs to go.

 

Karkat lives inland – absurdly inland, even compared to your mountain city, nestled right at the base of two peaks with miles of plains between it and the shore. Fuck, AA lives closer to the sea than KK. How did Eridan even get out there? Did he walk? Must have taken him all night and part of the day.

Or maybe most of the day and part of the night.

You touch down just outside KK's suburb, since there's no reason why you should let his neighbors know you're both psionic and powerful enough to lift your whole body off the ground. You ARE tired, at this point, though. It's been a couple hours since you set out, and the moons are just starting to set. Thank gog almighty he sent it when he did, because if he was in trouble and the sun was rising, there wouldn't have been much you could have done. You don't, after all, own a suitably sun-blocking travel cloak, and it's not raining anymore, which could have provided some shelter.

You reach Karkat's door and rap against the wood with one knuckle. You hear a shout and the sound of someone thumping down the stairs – that's definitely karkat, you realize, and thank everything that he's still well enough to bounce his way around. (He gets so deliciously angry when you describe him as bouncy or hyper. It's great.)

“Look who decided to show up,” he says, crossing his arms when he throws the door open. He's got his gray contacts in, and he actually looks fine. A little nervous, maybe, but otherwise just fine.

“Hey nooksucker, what's the big deal? Why the cryptid message? What's going on.”

He beckons you inside, and you duck through the doorway. (It's also a shame he's nearly as small as a blueblood. It's not quite unusual for lowbloods to be much taller or just larger than their highblood counterparts, but since he's always been trying to pass as rust… well… he's nearly 2 feet shorter than AA and that's _not_ passing. Too bad he blushes rusty colors, he could hide with higher castes if he wanted. Everyone knows he's some sort of mutant but they don't know quite the extent of it.)

You look around after he shuts the door. There's no sign of Eridan. There's a towel on the couch, but otherwise, there's no sign he's had any visitors at all.

“It doesn't look like fishdick was even here. What happened?”  
KK sighs. “He's sleeping.”  
“...In your 'coon? Why would you let him do that? You sure he didn't hurt you?” You bend down and grab KK's cheeks between your fingers and look him in the eye, but he just raises an eyebrow and bats your hand away.

“If you're so fucking worried, come look. He's totally wrecked.”

You chuckle a little at the thought and follow KK upstairs.

 

He does look fucking wrecked.

Eridan's shivering in KK's coon, one hand curled around his horn in an extremely conciliatory gesture, like he's trying to moirail himself in his sleep. You frown.

“What'd he do, then? Did _you_ beat the shit out of _him_ and dump him in your coon out of pity or something? You better not be going pale for Ampora of all people. He's an ass, KK, he's not worth it.”

“Actually, he came in here spouting nonsense about me becoming and orphaner and asked me to cull him. I don't know where he got the idea, but he thinks Condy will excuse my mutation if I work for her. Well, okay, I know where he got the idea, but it's still absurd. His mutations are so much less cullbait than mine are.”

You put your hands on your hips. “He's not even a mutant.”

“I'm actually… not so sure.”

You give him an exasperated look.

“Hey, you weren't there, okay? Yeah, he's a drama queen, but he was freezing and I made him take a bath and I didn't realize he was done till an hour after I left the room I hear him crying. He says that Condy asked him to do this because she wants to prove he's worth keeping. I say we wait to call bullshit on the matter.”

“All right,” you grumble, but you're not quite satisfied. KK leads you upstairs.

“Anyway, we need to figure out how Eridan and I are going to both make it out of this alive. No one but us knows all the details of the situation, so I figured you were our best help. Besides, you're a mutant too, and powerful as hellfuck.”

You sit down on the couch and listen to KK ramble about strategy until the sun is well on its way past the horizon. You pet his hair and call him a douche and he falls asleep on top of you.

 

* * *

 

Your brain feels slow.

There's something very wrong but you can't quite pinpoint it-- first and foremost you feel very, very hot, like you've been lit on fire. Were you lit on fire? Maybe you were, you feel like you might have been. Secondly, you ache, you ache in every muscle and joint and even in your goddamned pan, like every bone in your body called its neighbors in painful melody. Your eyelids are hot.

You open your eyes to discover that you are in an unfamiliar recuperacoon.

Well that's nice.

You sit up and discover that the world outside of the slime is very, very cold, and you almost go back under except that the slime itself is far too hot and you whine, _but you're in a strange hive, shut up_ – and you push yourself over the rim of the coon and onto the ground, sagging against the side.

You think you might have fallen asleep again because when you wake up you feel sticky like you're covered in sopor that's had a chance to dry out.

You push yourself to your feet. Your sleeve falls down past your hand and – oh right. Karkat's house. It's cold in here, you realize, and you wrap your arms around yourself. Your head pounds and you lean against the coon again, trying to regain your balance.

You walk into the hall and see that the room across is a respiteblock, which you suppose is intentional. It's good to be able to clean up right as soon as you wake up. You close the door as quietly as you can and turn on the showerhead, pausing before disrobing because you don't have any clothes. You turn, and see your outfit from the previous day (including socks, thank goodness) folded on the counter. You sigh in relief and shower.

You feel a little better after your shower. Your suncloak was also in the bathroom, and for that you're especially glad, because you feel so cold.

You curl up on Kar's respiteblock floor, wedged in next to the coon, and wrap your cloak tight around you.

You're so tired. Why are you so tired? _Maybe you're sick_ , your brain supplies. You don't want to be sick. Seadwellers don't get little common colds. It's either basically nothing or it's the whole real deal and you really, really do not want to be sick.

You drift into sleep.

 

“Eridan.”

Mnph.

You blink. Your eyelids feel crusty and heavy.

“He's running a fever,” someone else says, behind … Kar, tripping over their s's.

“You think I can't tell, you armchair? Get some water.” He turns his attention back to you. “Eridan can you sit up?”

Your brain glitches as it tries to process what's going on.

“Who?”

“That was Sollux. Remember? I said I was going to call him over. Can you sit up?”

There's a hand on your shoulder, helping you push your body into a more upright position. You lean your head back against the wall and suddenly your stomach flips over and you dry heave, fuck, fuck, it's been days since you last ate anything and now you're sick and this is not going to help. Karkat's saying something and you missed it.

Sollux is back, and then Kar's holding a glass to your lips and you drink maybe a little too greedily-- he pulls back and you whine.

“Wow, you're really out of it, aren't you?”

You don't move to acknowledge him. You feel like you've been turned to stone. Your eyelids are hot and heavy and you want to tell him something but then someone is lifting you in their arms, carrying you up the stairs. You're put down on a lumpy but comfortable surface and someone paps your cheek. Everything hurts.

“Shhh, it's okay, hey, just sleep, you'll feel better.”

He puts something cold on your face and you whine, but you still can't get yourself to move the way you want to so you just sort of wriggle away. He keeps papping your face. Someone says something, somewhere, and then your world starts to fragment again.

 

* * *

 

You finish making another sandwich and stick it in your cooler. It's a smallish cooler, it'll fit okay in your captchalouge – fuck carrying anything.

“Do you think we can stop at Eridan's hive before we actually get going? We do have to head past his bay before we actually reach the caves. He forgot his glasses and stuff, and we're already planning to stop at your hivestem...”

“How did he forget his glasses?”

“Fuck if I know. He's got spares, though.”

“I guess. If he doesn't slow us down too much.”

“It's not HIS fault he's sick.”

Sollux scoffs. “Eheh. Nah. He just walked to your inland hive in the rain, during the day. That'd never get _anyone_ sick.”

“Okay, yeah, maybe it's his fault he's sick but he was expecting to die so you can't exactly blame him for being reckless.”

“Did he… really think that?” Sollux looks at you with big multicolored eyes.

“If it was an act, he should go into acting.”

“He's never seemed the type for that,” Sollux grumbles, stuffing a waterbottle into his backpack.

“He's flamboyant enough, but… I don't think he's ever pretended well enough to fool anyone.”

You captchalouge the now full cooler and lean against the counter. Sollux jabs you in the side with his psionics and you chuckle. This would feel so normal, if you weren't literally packing provisions to run away and hide.

“Hey, shut up. I know you're thinking. Everything's going to be fine. The only one who's allowed to beat you up is me.”

Sollux's voice is soft enough that you know he's serious. You lean against his side with a sigh. “Yeah.”

Eridan comes stumbling into the kitchen, his cloak pulled tightly around his shoulders, little shivers running down his body like he's still cold. (Sollux says he was almost warm to the touch yesterday – absolutely fucking incredible.)

“Hey fishface. What woke you?”

“Head hurts,” he says, eyes directed in the vicinity of his socks.

“I should have given you something for that yesterday,” you mutter, pushing off the counter and past one of Sollux's amiable bats and towards the medicine cabinet. You pap Eridan's face on the way past – still far too hot – and grab some pills.

He's curled up on the couch when you return, horns shoved into the cushions. You give him some water and make him sit up and make goddamned sure he swallows all his medication like a good little fish before making him lie back down and covering him up with an extra blanket. You slide a pillow under his head, too, because fuck, if he's going to suffer he better do it fucking comfortably.

“Are we leaving soon?” Sollux fakes a really big yawn from his position in your kitchen.

“We'll go tomorrow of fucking course – its far too close to dawn right now. Go coon, you fucking ass.”

“Are you coming?”

“I'm going to watch over grumpy gills. Make sure he doesn't trip and break his horns.”

“Don't stay up all night.”

You grunt in feigned acknowledgment. You both know you don't sleep a lot. You might try, though.

You wonder if your unabashedly pale feelings for the fish stick are going to pass when he gets better, or if you'll be stuck with this (probably) unrequited serendipity for the rest of your pitiful existence.

 

* * *

 

“I hav-ve more sun cloaks at my hive,” you say, pushing yourself up on your elbow.

Yeah, wow, you're both awake and lucid. They seem so surprised. You suppose you can't put it past them – you don't even know how long you've been out of it. You still feel shaky and wrong, but you seem to remember someone giving you medicine, and a warm hand petting your hair. You blink and squint at the two of them.

“Hey, you're awake. Think you can manage a trek to Sollux's hive?”

“I don't know, but I guess I can try,” you say. You sit up. Your head spins a little, but you're mostly steady. You can do this. You have to.

 

“I can't do this,” you groan, and karkat shoves your head down at the horn.

“Stop it, you ass, you haven't stopped complaining since we left. We can't go back now so suck it the fuck up.”  
You groan and stumble after him. You feel like your whole body is disintegrating, and for some reason the moons are too fucking bright – how are you going to deal with the sun in the following weeks? You don't know. You don't know a single goddamn thing.

You think you're just about to pass out when Sollux slips an arm under you and you're lifted, world swirling in color. You just shut your eyes because this week has been all together too much and to be honest you can't wait to put society behind you. Then you realize that you're flying, the red and blue sparks of Sol's psionics making your eyes hurt in your skull. You groan and curl a hand in his shirt.

He puts you down on what you guess is his respiteblock floor and you lie there for a minute, waiting for the world to stop rocking before you push yourself more upright.

Sol draws the curtains and Kar forces a waterbottle on you. He mutters something about making food and Sol sits down next to you, leaning against the recuperacoon and frowning.

“Remember that stupid half assed rivalry we had when we were kids?”

You snort.

“Yeah, what about it? You have a real kismesis now, besides, wasn't that bullshit unrequited for the most part? I was an ass.”

“You still are an ass,” he says, but there's an unfamiliar fondness in his voice. You stare at your (still, unclipped) toe claws and worry your lip with your teeth. Why is he bringing up your shitty six sweep old crush now, when you're going to be stuck in a cave with him for however many perigrees?

_Why are you staying with them anyway? You're a highblood. Just cull them and ascend to your rightful place._

_No, fuck you, we've discussed this._

_You always were too stupid for the empire._

_Maybe the empire is stupid!_

_No it's fucking not! How would it have lasted this long if it was bad?_

_It's fucking corrupt!_

“ED?”

You pull yourself out of your thoughts.

“What?”

“You were making, uh, a face.”

“Why is that noteworthy?” you raise an eyebrow.

“Well it just looked like… Nevermind.” He shifts and sits up a little more and then screams “KK WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!” making you jump.

“FUCK YOU I'M COOKING! FUCK OFF!”

“MAKE ME!!!”

They sound like the voices in your head, except that you know they aren't serious. _I am my own kismesis_ , you consider, but no-- your inner arguments aren't as lighthearted or well meaning as a kismesis's might be.

You rub your temples.

What the fuck is wrong with you?

 

* * *

 

You dream.

Eridan is holding you.

He whispers things in your ear, and his voice hurts like it's going to pop your eardrums. Something warm and wet runs down your cheek and you reach up to wipe it away. Are you crying? No, that's blood, you're bleeding, why are you bleeding? You stand up, you push Eridan away but he's turned lusus pale and that's not Eridan, you stumble back and you trip only to discover that you're not standing on ground, you're in the ocean and you can't breathe ---

You gasp and flail and find yourself in a mess of bright red sopor slime, not blood, it's the wrong consistency – and you sigh. You're fine. You're fine and you can breathe underwater anyway so what the fuck kind of dream was that? You can't drown. You reach under your shirt and run your fingers along your opercula. (Not that you use them much.)

You turn around and watch Eridan's sleeping form for a few minutes. You have to quell the sudden urge to reach out and pet his eyelashes. They're so fucking long.

“You're awake,” someone says from across the room. You turn.

“Hey nookhorns,” you say. He's sitting at his computer, doing something. “What are you up to? I thought we weren't going on the internet since we're running away.”

“Buying us time. Delete all records from the system. That's the plan, anyway, but if you keep interrupting me I won't have it done by evening.”

You open your mouth to snark back but then stop, because that DOES sound important. You sink into the sopor a little. It's colder than you're used to, for Eridan's sake, but not quite too cold to deal with while wearing a sweater and the thickest socks in Sollux's closet. Maybe that's why you had a daymare.

“Is ED okay?”

You turn back to Sollux – what? Since when did he care about Eridan?  
(Since when did YOU care about Eridan?)

“What?” You look at Eridan – he's still sleeping, shivering a little like he has been the past few days. You reach for his forehead and it's cool to the touch. “I think so, why?”

“I don't know, he made a face earlier and it reminded me of… well….” Sollux shakes his head, leaning on his desk. “Maybe I'm just imagining things.”

“What?” you say, more insistently.

“It reminded me of my downswings. I don't know. It's stupid. It's probably just the stress of the past few days.”

“He's been sick.” You shrug. “That could make anyone a little down.”

“Yeah.” Sollux doesn't look convinced.

After a few akward moments, he goes back to his project.

You sink back into the slime. Eridan better fucking recover because you're just so done, and it's upsetting Sollux.

(it's cold in here.)

You manage to fall back asleep.

 

* * *

 

“I managed to delete us,” Sollux says. He rubs his face with one hand. You're tempted to reach out and move his bangs out of his eyes, but you stop yourself.

“Okay,” you say. “I figured out how-w we're gonna hide the evidence when we visit my hive.”

Karkat looks up from his leftover noodle and cheese dish with a raised eyebrow.

“Whale, I've got my boat on this side of the water, obviously. If I take you guys back to a secluded harbor and then sink it… they'll hav-ve to go lookin to find it.”

“You're going to sink your boat? You love that thing. You've probably snogged it.”

You fiddle with your fingers, they're still ringless, which has stopped bothering you quite as much as it had a few days ago. You remember throwing your rings at the wall. “We're gonna die,” you manage.

“Since when did you care?”

_Yeah, you utter fuck, since when have you cared about lowbloods? Karkat's right. You're just pulling bullshit._

_Shut up!_

_Make me. Oh wait! I'm you. Every thought I have is your thought. That you're thinking. On your own._

You want to tear out your hair so bad. Or maybe just rip your whole head off. You growl.

“Eridan?”

Fuck.

You disentangle your fingers from your hair as calmly as possible, flicking little dark violet strands off your fingers. “What?”

“Are you alright?”

“Are YOU alright? You've had a long week.” You lean on your knee.

“You make it sound like you haven't had a long week.”

“I'm a highblood. I can deal.”  
“Doesn't that only apply to physical things?”

“Nah, why do ya think w-we're less susceptible to the glub?”

“That's still… not…. Whatever. Be a stuck up asshole if it makes you happy. We've got to go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw i have a few works that I am thinking about finishing/editing for posting, go ahead and tell me which ones you want me to do!  
> These are all finished or half finished.  
> -fuckiing lawnmower2 (erisolkat, mostly solkat with a focus on sollux -- the boys take care of sol when he gets a headache)  
> -eridan gets one of sollux's headaches (erisol postgame, unnamed)  
> -more pipesstuck (i have 3 wip fics in this verse.)


	3. Sollux

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Take a deep breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now there's going to be an epilouge because there's no way i couldn't make this a cliffhanger

“Are you sure you're going to be able to do this? This is a nice boat.” Karkat's running his hands along the handrail. You glance back at him. Sollux is leaning against said rail and rubbing his temples.

“Yeah, it's fine, please drop it Kar. We've gotta hide it somehow.”

“What are you gonna do when we get out of this mess? Dig it back out?”

“When? Wow, Kar, that's fucking optomistic of ya.” Unless Fef manages to kill the Condesce before you get out, well… you're not going to.

“Eridan.”

“What?”

Karkat scurries to the helm, pointing out past you. You squint through the stupid white markings all over your glasses. There are two ships headed towards your hive from another direction.

“Fuck.”

_What if they've spotted you already? They're close enough._

_This ship's smaller. We're fine. We'll change course and head closer to the shoreline._

_Better go FAST._

Your heart beats right up in your throat like it wants to limit your air supply while you switch directions-- thankfully, there's a steadier wind the way you want to go, but that's not a relief.

_They've already seen you, maybe if you turn yourself in with Karkat's dead body they'll let you go –_

_No! Fuck fuck you fuck no!!_

_You're going to die eventually if you keep this up –_

You take a deep breath. Focus. Steer the ship. Karkat's keeping his eyes on things.

Sollux has sat up a little, watching the new threat. He looks sick. Is he okay? You blink a little and nearly hit yourself in the head with the sail.

Focus, focus focus focus.

You tighten your grip, but it doesn't stop your hands from shaking.

 

You steer the boat into the tiny little harbor and tie it off to the dock. It's about midnight by now. You haven't made especially good time but you didn't really expect to. You jump out, ignoring the feeling of wet socks, and run up the hill hiding you from the ocean so you can look over the ridge.

The boats are gone. They could be docked at the other side of your shiphive, but, scanning the horizon, the bay and the visible barrier islands, you can't see them at all. You grab handfuls of grass in your fists and bury your face in the ground for a few shuddering seconds.

You stumble back down the hill. Your heartbeat hasn't quite decided to calm and you're feeling dizzy, at least partly from relief. You have a job to do, though.

“They're gone,” you tell Kar and Sol. Sol looks relieved and Kar looks grumpy.

“Where are we going to stay today, then? We can't stay here. We don't have enough sun cloaks.”

“We're gonna have to go quick, but there's a cave not too far from here. An', yeah, tomorrow's gonna be hell but I can give you my cloak if ya want, Kar, Sol's too big but if we put shirts over our faces maybe we won't go blind.”

“Sollux very conspicuously has sunglasses, douchefins, I'm more worried about his arms. We won't be out all day anyway.”

“That's true.” He could get really bad sunburns, but chances are he wouldn't be permanently disabled from that even if he got scars… and as much as you hate to be that guy he already has scars, around his eyes and on his hands and neck and upper arms, presumably from fighting his lusus and years of psionics.

You pause for a moment.

“I gotta sink this,” you say. You take off your cloak and put it on the ground. “I'll try an' get a better idea of whether or not we'll be followed while I'm out there. Uh. See you in a bit.”

Kar chews his lip as you cast off.

 

You can't see anything, even out far enough to safely sink your sailboat and hide it. You feel achey all over.

_What if they're underwater?_

_Well I guess I'm about to find out._

You decaptchalouge a quieter, less dramatic gun than Ahab's and shoot the bottom of the boat. For a moment, you just stand there, watching the damn thing fill up with water, then you put the gun away. _What if they find the bullethole and put two and two together?_

That little evil voice in your head is really starting to get to you. You almost go to argue that wouldnt lead them to you but then you realize no, it's right this time, maybe it always has been.

You grab the edge of the floor panel and tear it off. The water stops creeping and starts flooding into the boat. You shiver – it's cold tonight. Your palms are sweaty, and you can feel your heart beating in your fingertips.

The boat falls faster than you do, of course. You sink below the rolls of the ocean, taking a deep breath through your gills. Bright violet hair gets in your eyes, (stupid mutant hair that got you into this whole fucking mess in the first place) and you brush it out of the way. You blink to adjust your (admittedly, shitty) vision and warily eye a light in the distance. Okay, okay, one light is probably just a traveller, not a threat. They'd have a lot of lights. Calm the fuck down.

(One light could be a scout.)  
(They're not going to bring a whole army looking for you, and you're not at war. Stop.)

You swim towards shore, glancing over your shoulder every fifteen seconds to see if the light is following you.

(It isn't.)  
(No it turned there-- what if it is)

(no it isn't.)

You climb out of the water, feeling bedraggled, and switch gears. Land time. Karkat gives you a patented look and you push soggy hair out of your face, putting on your stupid aquarius glasses again. You're going to have to pick the paint off the lenses at some point.

 

“Eridan.”

You jump when Karkat puts a hand on your shoulder. You're still a little shaken up over the whole boat incident – you keep overthinking the goddamn light, what if it actually WAS relevant, what if it wasn't just some traveller...

“Yeah?”

“That's the fifteenth time in the past minute that you've looked over your shoulder. We're not being followed. We're fine.”

“How can you be so calm?” Sol scowls. “You're the most at risk here.”

“Yeah, and in case you hadn't noticed, I've been cullbait since I fucking hatched. I'm used to it. You both need to calm your rumblespheres. The less jumpy we are the more likely we are to fucking survive.”

“You're not scared?”

“Of course I'm fucking scared, what kind of question is that? I just know how to keep a level head.”

You shut up and try to be more discreet.

 

The cave isn't particularly interesting. It's shallow and jagged and not very homey. Something drips in the back.

Sol's eyes flicker a little brighter and Kar decaptchalouges an entire cooler. The sun is rising, and you'd really rather sleep than eat-- after all, you ate a little this morning.

“You had an entire cooler in your captcha? Holy fuck, Kar.”

“Some of us go places fucking prepared you dipshit. Maybe you should take a leaf out of our books.”

“I was perfectly prepared to die, thank you Kar, it's not my fault things didn't go as planned.” You cross your arms.

“You were prepared to die, yeah, but were you prepared to stop and fucking consider that I might not be willing to let that happen?”

“Whale, I thought you might want to surv-vive, you know. Standard fuckin procedure.”

“I'm a fucking Vantas. I don't kill my friends for no reason, especially when they practically roll on the floor for me. What were you expecting me to do, immediately cut your exposed jugular?”

“What the fuck does your lineage have to do with it? Your ancestor w-was a Maryam and you know it.” You sip a little water from one of the bottles in the cooler.

Sollux bites into a sandwich, frowning at Karkat. “How does he know about your mutation anyway? I thought you only told people you trust.”

“He figured it out from descriptions of the signless in history books, or at least that's what he says. I don't know. A long time ago. I think I was six when he first messaged me about it.”

Sollux watches him.

He sighs. “Listen, if you think I didn't fucking consider that he could have turned me in, you're the stupid one. There's no way. Besides, I think I know how the information got out. Maybe.” Karkat picks at the bread on his sandwich, chewing the inside of his mouth. He doesn't elaborate.

You lapse into silence. Sollux leans on your shoulder. Part of you wants to push him away, but in the end, you just let him stay. He's warm and it's a comforting gesture.

You almost laugh when you realize that the last thing you would have expected to be doing, just a week ago, was falling asleep on Sollux's shoulder in a cave.

 

* * *

 

Your head hurts.

It's been fucking pounding since you left your hive the evening before last, and you are so fucking tired of it. You took some pills this evening but they don't seem to be helping at all. Maybe it has to do with using your psionics – which you are, since they're faster than walking, and Condy decided to care about where Eridan was faster than you three had hoped. Bullshit.

You don't want to let them know, though, because right now you all have much bigger fish to fry than one stupid headache courtesy of Sollux fucking Captor. You glare at some woolbeasts as you fly over a valley. Mother. Fucking. Bullshit.

Eridan has somehow managed to get his hand right behind your opposite ear. He rubs a finger against the back of one of your earrings, probably by accident, and you hitch up your grip on him. He squeaks, and Karkat clings tighter from the other side. You don't really feel like teasing him right now. You don't feel like doing anything. Lying down on the ground would be nice. You swallow and keep going.

You basically collapse when you reach the first safe cave. Your hand finds a wall and you slide down it less than gracefully. The early morning sun definitely hadn't helped, and now your arms were covered in little rashes, skin peeling in places. Eridan decaptchalouges something.

“Sol, you okay? Can I --” He puts a hand out towards one of your arms. It's blurry.

You just groan.

“Sollux, you…. Words….”

You try to catch what theyre saying but the world sorta rotates fifteen degrees clockwise and then you're sinking through a sluggish darkness.

 

“...think he's waking up. Sol?”

you feel like someone replaced every bone in your body with twice its size in lead. Your head throbs.

It feels like you're lying on two metal pipes, but that can't be right, you're in a cave. You open your eyes to the sight of gray sweatpants.

You never realized how much muscle Eridan has. Fuck. Is there ANY fat on his body?

“You're a fucking rock,” you mutter.

“Can you sit up? I have w-water.”

You groan and roll onto your face so your nose is squished between his wiry thighs. He runs a hand through your hair, lingering on one of your smaller horns. You feel like you're too hot and too cold at the same time and it's terrible.

“You're sparking.”

“Mfph.”

“Sol. Come on.” He slides an arm under your back, trying to push you somewhat upright. The world reels around you. You want to help him but your mind blanks, and for a few moments you can't see. When your thoughts return through fizzy bits of static you're aware that you're not longer squashed against the wierdly powerful musculature of eridans upper legs.

You run through your senses. Touch? Check. Your back is against a wall, you can feel it. Sight: eeh. Patchy like you whited out, which you did, so it should be fine. Hearing? There's something dripping, so you think that one's okay. You blink a few times, and your vision clears. You feel weak and trembly, your head pounding but not throbbing like a migrane. It's something else.

Shitfuck, you must have caught Eridan's bug.

Eridan holds a waterbottle to your mouth and you drink – holy hell you are thirsty, but ED doesn't let you drink fast. He takes the waterbottle away after a while, and pets your sweaty hair. His hands are so cool… holy fuck. You lean towards him, his fridgid seadweller fingers fidding with one of your earrings.

He lets you nudge your head onto his shoulder so your front horns are pressed against the back of his neck. He says something to KK but you've become thoroughly distracted by falling back asleep.

 

Time fades in and out for a while. You wake up a couple times and someone encourages you to drink water, and then you drift off again.

When you finally come to in a more lucid fashion you're curled up against KK. Your face is buried in his gross sweaty hair.

“Take a shower,” you mumble.

“Excuse you, nookmunch, we are hiding from hell and all her magic robots in a fucking cage, where do you expect me to fucking shower??”

You grumble. Oh yeah.

You feel KK sag a little against you. “Are you feeling better?”

You take stock of your situation. You feel heavy and droopy and lazy and also incredibly tacky from sweat and overall kinda gross but your head doesn't hurt overmuch. You open your eyes, wiggle your fingers. “I _think_ so?”

“That's good.” Karkat shifts, pushing you onto the floor. Your head misses the floor by landing on your arm.

“Ass.” you grumble.

“I do my best.”

You push yourself up and lean back against the cave wall. It's mercifully cool. You're still a little hazy, a little shaky, and you're so glad that you don't have to go anywhere. Karkat hurls a sandwich and a waterbottle at you and you wince when you stop them with your psionics because – wow – okay that hurts right now, psionics hurt right now. You put the sandwich down within your physical reach carefully and thunk your head back against the wall.

“Where's ED?” You crack the waterbottle and take a deep swallow.

“He's keeping watch.”

You sit up a little, pulling the bottle away from your face. “That's a thing we're doing? Isn't that more likely to get us seen than just hiding in the cave?”

KK huffs. “Eridan's the best shot in the fleet. Granted all he's got is a cheap little gun he forgot was in his sylladex, but he's still formidable. And in case you didn't notice when you BROUGHT us here, the goddamn cave has a bottleneck and stuff growing in front of it. It's almost impossible to see this place exists unless you're looking for it. This way, we know what sorts of animals come past. Maybe we can snag some food.”

You grunt and open the sandwich. It's a flavor you don't really like. You stare Karkat right in the eye and eat the whole thing.

 

* * *

 

 

Sollux is feeling better. You can tell right away when you stumble back in from your shift, sticking your gun back in your strifedeck. Karkat gives you a lighthearted shove as he heads off to take your place.

It's kind of intimidating, actually, being alone with Sol. He could crush you if he pleased, in fact… he's come close before. Not that you blame him. Most of the things people do to you seem completely reasonable in retrospect even if you didn't see it that way at the time.

He's lounging up against the side of the cave, doing something or other on his palmhusk (you wonder if it's the internet, hope it isn't because it's not hard to track location via connection, remember this is Sollux, and then decide it probably is the internet.) and paying about as much attention to you as a rock pays attention to a blade of grass.

You grab a water from the cooler and stand somewhere out of the way.

“Hey fishdicks, come here.”  
You choke a little on your water and slide over to sit down. You try not to cough. Sollux glances at you, expression unreadable.

“What?”  
“I want you to send a message to FF.”  
You push yourself up a little. “But-- didn't you delete our handles? – how--”

“Shut up. I made you a new one.” He hands you the palmhusk.

“Oh. Okay.”

You stare at the screen for a moment. You're not sure if you're supposed to feel insulted by the handle or not. It's fitting, you have to admit, but it's not particularly regal… and it's still got your old initials. Feferi is online.

“W-what exactly do you want me to say?”  
“The empress is coming for her friends. It's time to challenge her.”

You scramble. “What??? We can't say something like that!! Fef isn't powerful enough to --”  
Sollux holds up a finger. “Shut up, fins. Tell her to bring her friends with her. She's lucky. She has mutants behind her.”

“Oh. Uh. Shore.”

“Oh and--” sollux stops you just as you start the conversation.  
“What?”  
“Don't use your quirk.”  


\--CarnivorousAmphibian [ca] began trolling CuttlefishCuller [cc] !!--

CA: Feferi Piexes  
CC: ) (ow do you know my name? That's super CR-E-EPY  
CA: the culling drones are coming for your friends. It's time to fight her.  
CC: W) (AT are you TALKING aboat??????  
CA: You don't have much time. Some are already gone. Challenge the empress, and take your mutant following with you. Defeat her. Put an end to this.  
CA: Message this handle if you make it through.  
CA: Goodbye, Feferi.  
  


\--CarnivorousAmphibian [ca] ceased trolling CuttlefishCuller [cc] !!--

 


	4. Epilouge

 

\--CuttlefishCuller [cc] began trolling CarnivorousAmphibian [CA] !!--

CC: It worked  
CC: though your plan was TOTALLY c) (eating!!!  
CC: But I won!!!  
CC: I cant believe I won!!!!!!!!!!!!  
CA: there is no cheatin in lovve and wwar, fef  
CC: –----ERIDAN?????  
CC: O) ( MY FUCKING GLUB YOU LITTL-E BASTARD  
CA: it wwas transparent I havve the same initials and color wwho did ya think it wwas  
CC: I dont know?? I t) (oug) (t you were D-EAD!!!  
CC: You better not ) (it on me  
CA: hold your fuckin horses I havve a matesprit and a moirail im not interested  
CC: o)( my glub  
CC: wait since w)(en??????????

 

–

 

“Do you hate me?”

It's the kind of question that you ask when you wish someone was hurting you, in the most platonic sense, making you feel as worthless as a little part of you wants to believe. Or maybe it's a big part. You huddle closer to yourself.

“Not anymore?” Sol says, making a funny little gesture. “I hate kar. He makes an excellent kismesis.”

“I didn't mean romantically.” You tense, because, they could start yelling any moment, right? Either of them. Because you're being stupid again.

“Eridan.”  
Oh gog here it comes.

“Eridan you're not the same person you were when you were younger. You're still a crabass, a little hoity toity sometimes, but you literally came sobbing to kk's door asking him to fucking kill you. Little you would have had no problem killing the mutant.”

Karkat makes a disgruntled noise from across the room. “Stop calling me that.”  
“Make me.” Psionics crackle.

“W-whale,” you mutter, let your head fall back against the wall, glance at Kar.

“What.”  
“I'm not shore that's true. Uh. I mostly just wanted attention. It was conflictin', friends or superiors? But despite all the bullshark friends seemed to always win out. Probubbly because you guys are more likely to reciprocate.”

“Reciprocate? Yeah, no fucking duh, dipshit, HIC isn't gonna give you the time of day.” Karkat bites a sandwich angrily.

You can feel your earfins drooping a little, less within your control than they often are. “Wwhat about you?”

“What about me?”  
“Why do you reciprocate?”

his ears droop a little, and his face softens – you notice that he's missing one of his contacts, so his eyes are odd and mismatched like a parody of Sollux's. He's wearing Sol's shirt, which is far too big for him, and nearly falling off one of his shoulders. You simultaneously do and do not want to ignore the pity radiating across the room.

It disappears in an instant.

“Eridan-- No, Look at me, fuckwad-- Eridan I never fucking hated you. I go around saying I fucking hate everyone but – shut up – it was just a farce, fuckface, Fuck knows I needed some way to protect myself – Oh fuck, fuck you--” You realize too late that you're shaking, as Kar leaps across the room and he's right there he's right _there_ next to you touching your face –

“shhhhh.”

“You really do overthink shit, don't you?”  
Your focus shatters as you're reminded that yes, you are sitting right next to Sollux, and he nudges a little closer. You want to nudge away, some part of you wants to get up and run, but you don't.

“hey,” you say, leaning into his side. There's a little flutter in your chest, familiar because you've felt it before, foreign because you've never felt comfortable pursuing it – whether or not you had in the past.

Someone falls asleep. It might be you.

 

“I feel like you're trying too hard.”

“what?”

Sollux waves his hand in a circle. “All of a sudden you give a fuck about us mutant lowbloods. Even if you're a mutant too, why should you care?”

You choke on a deep breath, then try again, because oh boy is there a reason. There is one hell of a reason why you care about these fucking shitbl- Lowbloods. These _people_ , these people you've been _living_ with for – for – for a while now.

“because I lov-ve you?”

Sollux barks a laugh, then sees your expression and halts. “Oh, well.”

“W-what?”

“That's fine.”

“Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LONG TIME NO HOMESTUCK hey guys!! I ffffffiiiiinally finished this coddamn fic. Hope you enjoy! I originally planned to make this epilouge much longer, but I think that intent was actually my downfall. It's fine at the length it's at. (It needed some work, but not much, before posting.)  
> I'm not currently writing a lot of homestuck, but I still like homestuck, so it's entirely possible I might touch up/finish some homestuck fics in the future for posting on ao3. I certainly have plenty I could work on. :p  
> Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the ride!


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